Dear Micah (Newborn)

It has been amazing watching you change everyday. Everything you do is mesmerizing to us. Sometimes we find ourselves just staring at you for hours. Everyone says you are the cutest baby ever. We sure think so! We think that you look more like Daddy and you do not look as Asian as we had expected. You have the most beautiful, soft, dark brown hair and big blue-gray eyes. Your eyes get especially big when you are excited. From the day you were born, you have been a bundle of energy. You are always moving your arms and legs and especially love using your hands. Your movements already seem so refined. We love when you kick your legs really hard like you are riding a bicycle. You kick extra hard when you are hungry or getting your diaper changed. You absolutely hate diaper changes and scream at the top of your lungs. Daddy usually gets that job, which is why we call him the “Diaper Man”. You are so strong already. You grip fingers so tight that your knuckles turn white. And yes, we are already training you for rock climbing! In your short one month of life, you have already rolled from your tummy to your back several times (which we could never seem to catch on camera). We love watching all of your different facial expressions. Mama sits around with her camera in hand just waiting to capture all those little faces you make. You love to smile, even if it is just from gas (which you have a lot of). You sure are one noisy baby! You are constantly cooing, grunting, and squealing - even in your sleep! You are a much better sleeper at night than during the day. You love to be awake during the day, as if you don’t want to miss a single moment in this new and exciting world. You fight sleep all day and only take catnaps when you are so tired that you can’t keep your eyes open. We figured out your weakness when it comes to getting you to sleep. Car rides work like magic. You are in la-la land the second the car starts moving. You also love sitting in the baby carrier, where you can snuggle real close to us and listen to our heart beat. Daddy carries you and does laps up and down the stairs. It works like magic and Daddy gets a workout at the same time! You love being outdoors, we take you for walks in the neighborhood almost everyday. We can’t wait to take you outside for your first climbing adventure. You are getting so big already. You love your milk and you never miss a meal. Mama calls you her “little piglet”. You are eating so well that you never lost any birth weight. In fact, you have gained about a pound a week for the first month! We can’t wait to see what next month brings!

Doctor Hat Off, Mommy Hat On

When friends or family call or come by the house, they will frequently comment, "You're a pediatrician, you are a pro at this already!". I want to slap the next person that says that to me. I want to tell them, "Do you see the mountain of parenting books and magazines that are on this table? Yes, I read them on a daily basis when I have no clue what I am doing." I have come to realize that the majority of what it takes to be a parent is not written in medical textbooks and not taught in pediatric residencies. Yes, I know what to do if my son runs a fever or stops breathing or has a seizure. What I don't know is what to do when he is crying non-stop for an hour, demanding to be breastfed for hours on end, and refusing to sleep during the day. Needless to say, it has been and will continue to be, a humbling experience. I think back to all the advice I give to my patients on parenting - advice that is passed down from my mentors through the years, advice on something that I have absolutely no experience with. It's like being an auto mechanic when you have never owned a car. Micah teaches me valuable lessons everyday. Lessons that I could never learn from reading books and listening to lectures. Now when my twelve weeks of maternity leave is over, I can put my doctor hat back on...on top of my new Mommy hat. That combination can only make me a more humble, compassionate, and empathetic pediatrician. 

Micah has taught us many lessons during his short 4 weeks of life thus far:

- After the baby has fallen asleep, any attempt to move him to another more suitable location could spell disaster. Just leave him be.

- Don’t be a human pacifier unless you want to breastfeed non-stop for 5 hours. Buy one instead. 

- Learn to nurse in the side-lying position. It is a luxury for middle of the night or early AM feeds.

- Always pack extra diapers - more than you think you will need.

- Always pack extra clothes.

- Always pack extra of everything

- Car rides are like magic when it comes to soothing a screaming baby.

- Don’t try to cut a baby’s nails when he is awake. 

- Babies inevitably will pee (or poop) the second you take the dirty diaper off. Be prepared to seek cover. 

- Invest in a baby carrier, it may be the only way to free your hands in order to eat a meal. 

- Don’t dress the baby in white clothes when he has not pooped in 3 days. The big one is coming.

- Take advantage of every minute the baby is sleeping. This time is valuable and usually very limited, so use it wisely and efficiently. 

- Savor all the happy moments - the smiles, coos, and even the silence. These are limited as well. 

Life with a newborn

It's been two weeks of newborn bootcamp at the Y&CR residence.

After giving birth to Micah, I couldn't wait to bring him home, picturing sweet snuggle-fests, leisurely stroller rides, and playing dress up with all of his tiny monkey outfits. I am an overachiever, so of course, I had a list of other things I wanted to accomplish during my 12 week "vacation" as well. I had imagined I would have plenty of time to not only be a Mom, but to also perfect my newborn photography skills, make priceless home videos, and work on different projects around the house. But once we arrived home, reality set in. Life became a series of 24-hour breastfeeding, catnapping, and diaper-changing marathons that all rolled one into the next. Typically, by the time I look at the clock, the day is well into the afternoon. Forget about checking anything off of my "maternity leave to-do list", I usually have not even eaten lunch or taken a shower. There are times when an entire day can fly by and I have not moved from the vicinity of my living room.

Nighttime feeding and sleeping sessions take me back to my years in residency when getting any sleep, even if 1-2 hour increments, was considered a "good night". After a few nights of waking up to the "Micah pager" every hour, I chronically felt "post-call". I attempted to catch short snoozes during the day, which doesn't amount to much. Unlike residency, however, this pager never turns off. After a week of being on "Micah call" 24/7, sleep deprivation set in, as did the dark circles under my eyes. The days went by, one blurring into the next. I began to wonder how I was going to make it through weeks, months, and *gasp* years of this. Two weeks later, we introduced a bottle and CR took over one early AM feed. Four wondrous hours of shuteye later, I was a new woman. We have our routines down now and Micah is sleeping slightly longer periods at night...sometimes. The mental fog from sleep deprivation has slowly dissipated and we are adjusting to life with a newborn. We even manage to squeeze in some sweet snuggle-fests and leisurely stroller rides. On really good days, we play dress up in monkey outfits and I play photographer.

Enjoy Micah's newborn pictures!

                     

                     

                     

                     

M's Journey into the World

Wow. Nothing I could have done would have prepared me for what was to come for the next 16 hours. 

A short 2 hours after my last entry, the barely noticeable "cramps" turned into something a little bit more uncomfortable. Apparently, the rain storm and drop in barometric pressure had something to do with it. We had just sat down for lunch with a friend at Half & Half in Clayton when I started paying attention to what my body was trying to tell me. Discerningly, I pulled out my iPhone and started timing my contractions at the table...they were every 5 minutes. I started stuffing my face in between contractions, savoring every bite of one of the best breakfast skillets I have ever had. I was determined to finish this last meal before I head to the hospital. We quickly said our goodbyes, paid the bill, and scurried along to my doctor's office - 2 hours earlier than my scheduled appointment. They put me on the monitor and watched for the peaks and valleys of my contractions, which were now every 4-5 minutes. By this point, I had to pause and stop talking during them. They were definitely becoming more noticeable. I was 2-3 cm dilated, 80% effaced, and the baby was still quite high. With this news, we decided to not venture too far away from the hospital. I didn't think CR would be too excited about delivering his son on the side of highway 44. So, we made the decision to set up camp at the Drury Inn, where we spent the next 8 hours.

Our doula, Kate, arrived at the hotel after CR and I had made it through about 2 hours of fairly mild labor. Things started to get interesting after Kate arrived. Immediately, I noticed that all the pain was in my lower back. Apparently, this means that the baby is OP (occiput posterior position) - his head was pressing on my spine. We spent the next 8 hours using all the tricks in Kate's bag to try to turn him around. His stubborn personality was already emerging - he did not budge for the remainder of my labor. He must have inherited that trait from his Mama. Thus, we did things his way. CR and Kate did everything they could to help me cope with the intensifying back labor. They began cycling hot compresses between the microwave and my lower back. With each contraction, another towel was nuked and pressed against my body. My skin soon began to resemble that of a steamed lobster's. CR and Kate became a well oiled machine. They worked hard for hours, cycling between counter pressure, hip squeezes, hot towel service, and back massages. I stayed on my hands and knees, as it was the only position that was tolerable. As my labor progressed, I needed something more than what they were so diligently providing. So, I retreated to the bathtub around 6pm - just me and my headphones. I just wanted to be alone and escape to another place. I submerged myself in music from our wedding and allowed the movement and warmth of the water relax my mind and body. Two more hours went by. The contractions were coming every 3-4 minutes and lasting longer as well. Around 10pm, we decided it was time to head to the hospital to meet our little man.

The next 6 hours are more of a blur. After the excruciating 5 minute car ride, which felt like an eternity, we arrived at the hospital around 10pm. Kate predicted that I was already through transition and should be ready to push soon. Upon hearing that, the staff at the hospital made the registration process go by fairly quickly and got me into my laboring room. With the first check, we were all shocked to learn that I was only 3.5 cm dilated, 100% effaced, and -1 station. Mentally, I started to give up. How could I have labored so hard for 8 hours and only have my cervix change by 1 cm? Seemed like a lot of work for very little return. My goal of bringing our son into the world naturally now felt unattainable and I started contemplating getting an epidural. After some words of encouragement from Kate, I decided to wait on the epidural, hoping that things will start progressing more quickly from here.

After 3 more hours of back labor, I was begging to get back into the tub, which really seemed to help previously. They allowed me to go down the hall and use the hospital jet tub. At this point, I was only 6cm, but the baby had dropped significantly. I was beginning to see the finish line. Transition began not too long after I got back to my room. I progressed fairly quickly from 6cm to 9cm in about 2 hours. Those two hours of labor were perhaps the hardest thing I have ever done. Not only did I continue to have back labor, but I also had an overpowering and instinctive urge to push. Time and time again, I was told not to push against a cervix that was not completely dilated. All the breathing and meditation techniques I learned about now went out the window. I apparently gave CR "indian burn" on his arm, almost tore his shirt, and bit his hand (which I still don't believe I did). A resident doctor came in and broke my water when I was about 9.5cm dilated. After that, I was finally able to push. It was such a relief to be actively doing something during my contractions. That was the moment I asked CR if we could name him "Micah". Great timing...he agreed, wholeheartedly.

Thirty short minutes later, on Saturday, March 24th at 3:57 AM, Micah Chen Robinson arrived into our lives. He was 5 lbs, 8.8 ounces, and 19.25 inches long.

    

He had a headful of beautiful dark brown hair, slate blue eyes, and huge hands with long fingers. I was in a state of complete bliss from the moment I laid eyes on him. He was perfection. CR cut the cord and helped the nurse with Micah's first sponge bath. 

We stayed in the hospital for 2 days and Micah stayed in our room pretty much the whole time. Micah picked up breastfeeding immediately and even set a record in the nursery by gaining 3 ounces on his second day of life!






Since we have been home, it has been one wide ride, but I think we are adjusting fairly well. We have started our little family and couldn't be happier!

                                                                                                    

Mommy Love!

Proud Daddy!

 

Grandma, Grandpa, and Uncle Devin